The Cuddle Experience

I once tried to study the art of cuddling and it led me to sleep. I asked people to participate in the writing of Cuddleingus and they too fell deep into its grasp.

 It all began with a cuddle I once had with a friend who once had a friend who wouldn't cuddle, we became instant night time muraders. Said friend could not sleep without a proper cuddle and a tuck in, while I just needed a warm body spooned next to me at all times for comfort, some what the same yet very different approaches. Anyway, we came to the conclusion that we should make this coupling into a focus group. Said friend pointed out that it would destroy the pure nature of the cuddle, I might have agreed. 

 So there we were, on the verge of the greatest cuddle man has ever felt when a knock at the door interrupted the beginnings of a good carress, it was David. David just got dumped. David talked on and on about how it all was too much to handle and he wasn't sure how he was going to move on without said girl. I asked," Would you like a hug"? Through tears and a few protests, he accepted the hug which turned into a cuddle. It was soft, wet(from tears) warm and unconditional. His chest heaved deeply with rhythms of a 4year old who is trying not to continue crying. Cuddle friend and I embraced David like a lost family member  who was lost at sea for several years forgotten, found and lost again with a brand new name change to boot...you know, full on. Just before I could get into the best bits of the cuddle, the phone rings, I let it go to voicemail. With a large sigh I began to settle in to what I consider the sweet meat of cuddling when the doorbell rings, damn it. I excuse myself to answer. The two friends seemed very content in the abscence of my added heat and tenderness but the asthetics were not as pleasing without me, of course. I answered the door for the second time that evening to a angry Sadie. Sadie just dumped her girlfriend, for the third time, and had all kinds of thoughts about how life should be as a lesbian and a couple. I suggested a hug, she wanted none of it; in fact she shunned it quite aggessively to the point of offense, I took none. 

 For a time, she went on about how things aren't what they seem and that people are inheriently evil with intent to suck the life out of everything good you do. This type of thinking is called pity party and usually for one. I was there only as "a party to" said unplanned celebration for moral support. My mind couldn't help but go back to the cuddle fest, that is my meditation room, with two beautiful humans getting down to business. Sadie said a few things like," Why the hell would anyone want to have a threesome under the guise of...," or something to that extent. I aggressively grabbed her into my arms and hugged her tight. She fought like a badger caught in a bear trap in the middle of winter but I didn't let her go. She need to feel the security of that hug. Get to know her sorrow face to face. Let it out...she cried intensely. I didn't let up. I hugged her until she settled down to a rapid jerky breath and sob. When I pulled back from the hug my t-shirt was wet in the most colorful array of MAC make-up and lipstick, we laughed. She asked if I wanted to go and get a drink with her to drown sorrows, I declined. As Sadie began her reasons for wanting to drink, I led her towards the room of happiness. 

 There are a few things I am proud of in this lifetime and a few that I am not, this could go either way depending on how Sadie felt with the outcome. The door opened to a vastly large room decorated with pillows of variuos sizes and colors, lamps and lanterns from various different continents and countries and a side of artistry from various different people I know around the globe. The walls displayed a deep red back round, crimson or bavarian or something rich like that, with words from every language telling of a certain event over and over again. Sizes shapes colors and textures were thrown about willy nilly A mattress made of clouds and other fluffy stuff lazily lying across the floor enticing you to sprawl upon it. Above you, danced a collague of L.E.D. lights and rice paper globes serving the only purpose in this particular moment in time...creativity. Creativity is a place where only children are allowed to travel because we, as adults, have forget the importance of creating without a purpose. Creating because you want to, because you can and because you believe no one has thought of this before. Creativity makes you jump out of your skin and into another demension where skin isn't the thing that covers your body. When you look up into a ceiling full of light color and fun shpaes, creativity infects you with it's unconcious directive.

 Sadie's face froze in the most wonderful shock wave of,"what the Fuck is this Shit",  also my favorite," You dirty Whore"! For I am sure after the ordeal she just went through with her "now" ex-girlfriend, she had not planned on what she was witnessing right now. "I'm fucking out of here. Why would you do this to me"?  Face strained with anger fear hurt and shame, an overall overwhelming feeling, of only what I cold imagine, when she spun on her heel to turn  away, I stopped her. " This is cuddling, nothing more. Remember when I had insomnia and I took sleeping pills, drank tea, worked out and everything else"? She nodded unintelligibly,yes. " I found someone who needed the same type of connection. We made several attempts to date but it never worked out like we wanted. Whenever he would come over, he would cuddle. He and I have an agreement to cuddle as long as it doesn't interfere with our daily lives and it hasn't...trust me". Before I knew it, Sadie made inquiries about the loneliness, the comfort, the human exchange and what it meant to  be attached to someone not out of love but out of convenience? There were so many answers unquestioned yet we muddled through the best bits of the cuddle session...I didn't mind because, we were soon cuddling way into the morning without noticing anyone had left.

Not too long after that traffic filled evening for two, I began spending more and more time with Sadie. She and I would cuddle and talk about how love was truly and how love could be if so-and-so would only do this... impossible task exactly as I ask of them; we would laugh madly to each other and cuddle some more.